You Have a Friend as a Client! Now What?

Commentary October 05, 2023 at 02:59 PM
Share & Print

Here is a scenario familiar to most drivers. You are on a highway, two lanes in each direction. You are in the right-hand lane, perhaps because traffic is heavy. A car is joining your lane from the onramp. Once that car enters traffic, it slows down, probably because the driver is thrilled to have blended into moving traffic. You need to reduce your speed significantly because the adjacent car is far slower than surrounding vehicles. You silently curse, wondering why it isn't keeping up. 

Adding new account relationships has its similarities.

This person might be a friend who became a client. When you were prospecting this person, you were very responsive and attentive. Now that he has handed over a check or completed transfer papers, it can be tempting to throttle back, happy you have accomplished your objective of adding this client. Now you are the car entering the highway and your client is the car behind, wondering why the new arrival isn't keeping up.

There are several issues related to having a friend as a client, and here are approaches to best navigate those ties.

Balance in the Relationship

This will likely develop over time and pass through three phases. The first is when you are putting forth all the effort. You are checking with him about getting trade confirmations. You are reviewing his first account statement with him. This might be considered the onboarding process, but you are giving him plenty of attention. In new friendships, this might be the time you are picking up the phone a lot to call, but he is rarely initiating calls.

Once the relationship is established, the balance starts to even out. You are each calling about the same amount and initiating events. You invite him to client events like seminars, and he invites you to his home for a portfolio review or to get to know you better.

Now the relationship has matured. You may be getting out more than you put in. Periodic portfolio reviews are important, yet your client trusts you and is not very demanding. He understands your routine and knows who to call when something needs attention.

The Lesson: Ideally, we want clients to conform to our preferred way of doing business, yet we need to make the extra effort at the start of the relationship, similar to the way the car entering the highway should keep up with the speed of the traffic around it.

Demands on Your Time

Have you ever had a friend who calls you at 11 at night? There is no emergency; he just wants to talk and assumes since he is awake, you are too. He also will change the conversation on a social outing to a serious subject, like borrowing a lot of money. 

Sometimes, the friend who becomes a client might think you are available 24/7, just like calling a customer service number or accessing the internet. Even if you are the most easygoing, agreeable person in the world, you don't have account information in front of you at 11 p.m.

You will need to establish ground rules. I think a good way to approach this is to be mindful of clients' fears. Put them at ease. I would tell friends, "Now that we have a business relationship, I will only call you about business during business hours. I respect your private time." I would then add, "You are not held to the same rule. If something is on your mind, you can call me anytime." You might think that sounds reckless, but the answer was often, "No worries. We respect you have your private time too. We will only talk business during business hours."

The Lesson: Set ground rules, but be flexible in extraordinary circumstances.

Reporting Performance

When friends become clients, they are often secretly scared they might have to fire you if things blow up and the friendship perishes with the business relationship. I tell them if they become clients and follow advice, they should get a report card. If I am doing a lousy job, they should be able to fire me.

Periodic portfolio reviews are the report cards. These should be scheduled in advance, and there's a big advantage to that strategy: If the market has a bad day, a client might call and say, "How much money have I lost" or something equally scary.

Although you can answer questions because near-real time pricing is pretty common, it is difficult to put things into perspective on the fly. If you have scheduled portfolio reviews, you can mention, "We have a comprehensive review scheduled nine days from now, but if this is really important for you, we can move the date up to tomorrow." Often, the client should say: "I forgot about that. Nine days from now is fine."

The Lesson: Get portfolio reviews scheduled on a regular basis. It shows clients, friend or not, that you are accountable.

Respect for the Rules

We all know someone who has driven through a red light or crossed the street when the flashing sign says "Don't Walk." That person believes in the law in the larger sense but thinks you are allowed to bend or break the law in so-called little ways.

This repeats itself when friends become clients. They might want to take your advice on buying a stock in their IRA and then say, "Buy it in my spouse's account too." If you do not have a power of attorney on file, you cannot do that. Signing a spouse's name to a document could be a career ender, or something brought up in court. 

You might think there are gray areas, but you cannot give in even a little, because the exception becomes the norm. If the client wants to buy that stock in a spouse's account, say, "Let's get them on the phone." 

The Lesson: You might feel you are being too strict, but you are conveying a message about your integrity. When that friend has another friend who is getting divorced and needs another advisor, the potential client will remember that you stick to the rules and respect your clients' interests, regardless if they are present or not.

Friends can be tolerant of each other's behavior. They know everyone has good and bad days. When it comes to professional conduct, you must always be seen to be doing the right thing.

NOT FOR REPRINT

© 2024 ALM Global, LLC, All Rights Reserved. Request academic re-use from www.copyright.com. All other uses, submit a request to [email protected]. For more information visit Asset & Logo Licensing.

Related Stories

Resource Center